John was in his alcove, praying no one else in his wing was ever going to get lucky while he was there ( Read more... )

Packing for the cabin switch in the morning was a complicated task this year. Again John had a fish. Okay, so it wasn't the same one as last year. Or even the one after that one. He had bad luck with pets so he was mostly glad it was the same one as last week ( Read more... )

"Come on, buddy. You can't live under that rock forever ( Read more... )

It was really freaking cold. ( Cut for character death. Kinda. )

"Should ve vake him?"

"Only if you think he'll get us real food. This orange stuff is crap!"

Stirred by the voices, John's brain warned him that he should not wake up. If he'd been smarter, John would've listened and not cracked an eye open.

[For me and then open even as I flee for a short time!]

Finally things had quieted down. Over the last day (like time meant something to a turtle), if John one wasn't blathering on the phone, he was playing those loud games or crunching popcorn nonstop and generally making noises that were all painfully annoying to Yoda's elderly turtle ears ( Read more... )

John had managed to navigate a seemingly normal Sunday, complete with handwavey gym time and the purchase of a brand new fish, without any trouble. The new betta was blue and he'd decided to call it Bubbles 2 in honor of the previous fish who'd resided in the tank, may he rest in peace ( Read more... )

John woke up feeling oddly normal. He wasn't a girl or a bunny or even in love with someone he shouldn't be ( Read more... )

France was an okay place in John's estimation. Having managed to find his way to a pet store (and he even attempted speaking French to the clerk) and back, John decided he deserved to relax for what was left of the afternoon ( Read more... )

John was never sure about the amount of food pellets to pour into the fish tank. He figured it couldn't hurt to put in a little extra. It wasn't like the fish would overeat ( Read more... )